Mind Games, Redux
by Angst-BuriTTo
Summary: A small change in the childhood of two men makes all the difference, and spins a darker and more horrifying role-reversed tale of a beloved character. Trigger warning for implied Child Abuse (of all types) (If you have seen the episode, you know what the other triggers are, so don't complain you didn't know.) - TardisType40 (AO3)


"I'll never forget the day Gibbs caught this psycho, what about you?"

Special Agent Paula Cassidy looked to her partner, who nodded, grimacing.

The man remembered working in Philly at the time, just having gotten his detective badge, his father having been proud of him for his achievement, since he was young to get his gold shield.

He was one of the many cops that had taken time to volunteer to work shifts in and around the college campuses that the killer tended to take from.

They had always worked in groups of three, since a couple of times two were taken by the killer at the same time. Even with all the precautions, even with safety measures and being with the other cops just as trained as he was, he could still feel a shiver race down his spine at the remembered fear that always hung around during those two year of terror.

"Nope, got my first night of actual sleep when I heard this guy was behind bars." The brunette rubbed his hands together, trying to pull himself out of the old memories.

Paula looked back at the screen, and the SFA noticed that she had a twitch in her eyebrow, as if she wanted to glare the man to death through the screen.

"It would have been a lot less stressful if the guy only went after one gender, but he wasn't picky. Nobody felt safe." Paula bit her lip, and shook her head. "It was a long two years."

The SFA nodded, completely agreeing with Paula; those years dragged on like molasses. When the killer was finally caught by Gibbs, it was like the light that had been covered by heavy clouds of fear on every campus in Virginia was lifted- people went outside later, partied later, and laughed freely.

"Must have made dating tough for everyone, two years," He chuckled. "Hell, I couldn't get laid for most of that time. Every time I tried to pick up someone it was like I was the monster under the bed, or a leper."

"I don't blame them," Paula raised her hands at the narrow eyes look she got, relaxing at the spark of humor she saw in her partner's and SFA's brown eyes.

"Hey, I'm just saying, until Gibbs caught him, nobody knew who this guy was or what he looked like- everyone was suspicious, and being asked out on a date was something that made people afraid back then.

When you got asked out by some guy, you would always fear that he would be the killer. It was safer to say no and run the other way."

The SFA nodded, conceding to that. It would certainly be something to fear, and he had to admit to himself that the same thought had gone through his own head a few times when he was asked out over that period of time.

"Who's that?"

Paula turned at the question and raised an eyebrow disbelievingly at Tim, as did the SFA.

"You can't tell me you don't know who that is, McGee!" The brunett male asked in shock, laughing slightly. He stopped chuckling when Tim just looked at him blankly, clearly not understanding.

"Anthony DiNozzo Jr," he prodded ,

"Famous Serial Killer in the nineties? Killed and tortured thirty-two men and women over the course of two years before being caught?"

Tim looked shaken by the sheer number of victims.

"Oh, yeah," the probie gulped. "Now I remember, that was… not a good time for anyone. My mom wanted me to move back home."

"You know, he admitted to killing thirty-two, but only six bodies were found." Paula pointed out.

"But then DiNozzo made one very bad mistake," Kyle grinned, and Tim perked up.

"What mistake was that?"

"He killed two Petty Officers." Tim nodded,

"And then Gibbs caught him, like he always does."

"Got it one, Tim." Paula nodded.

"Well you'll know who he is soon, Gibbs is gonna interrogate him before he's sent to fry."

"Why would Gibbs want to talk to the guy?" Tim asked, confused.

"Because DiNozzo says he's gonna tell Gibbs were he hid all his victims bodies." Paula sighed.

"All those people… God, DiNozzo is worse than The Ripper, maybe even Bundy," she shook her head, looking at them. "Makes you wonder what could make a man into such a monster."

Kyle couldn't help but remember some of the things he had read in DiNozzo's file. His childhood, his rich father who knocked up a prostitute that he was cheating on his wife with, and the subsequent abuse, neglect and vitriol the you Anthony DiNozzo Jr had been subjected to his whole childhood. He could believe that that would turn anyone into a monster. He could read between the lines, and he knew that there had been some sexual abuse of young DiNozzo, possibly even his whore of a mother pimping him out.

Yeah, he could see that shaping someone into a monster.

But Kyle couldn't help but draw similarities between Anthony DiNozzo Jr and himself.

Kyle also had a prostitute for a mother.

He also had gone through abuse as a child.

But he was taken by CPS and given to his father, who had taken him in and raised him in a loving home, his father's wife raising him as if she had given birth to Kyle herself.

Kyle couldn't help but think that if CPS hadn't been called- if his father hadn't been willing to take him in, that he could have ended up in DiNozzo's place, up on that screen and dressed in orange, a scant few days from taking a government sanctioned dirt-nap.

'That could have been me…' the thought kept swirling in his head, and he felt a shiver down his spine.

Thank God he had gotten away from his mother.

"What the hell is he doing on my screen?"

Their leaders growled words made them jump from surprise and turn to face the older agent.

"We were just checking him out, Gibbs." Paula defended herself and her co-workers. Gibbs got in her face and gave her a narrowed eyed glare, and Paula leaned back and added quickly;

"And it was completely Kyle's idea, he asked me to do it, right Kyle?" Kyle shot the younger woman a sharp eyed glare, and huffed.

"No, we both agreed to it, since Gibbs was going to interview the guy, we would check him out so we could have his six."

Kyle leaned back when Gibbs turned his glare onto him, and met his Boss' eyes squarely, not showing that he was intimidated.

"That right, Boone?" Gibbs asked, his voice low and cold, and Kyle nodded.

"Yes, Boss."

"And where," Gibbs asked him icily, "Did you get the idea that I was interviewing this bastard, Special Agent Boone?"

Despite himself, Kyle found himself swallowing, and felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

Clearly, the subject of Anthony DiNozzo Jr was something that brought out Gibbs' anger more than he had ever seen.

"The Govender of Virginia seems to think you are, Gibbs," Paula spoke up, trying to draw Gibbs' ire away from her co-worker.

Kyle was grateful for her intervention; Gibbs usually wasn't the most happy of people, but he almost never deliberately made his team fear him.

They were family, something that tended to happen when you had to have the level of trust they had for each other in their job.

So Gibbs was tough on them, but fair. Gibbs still lost his temper on occasion, but he tended to only do that when it was something that hit him personally.

Clearly, this hit Gibbs very personally.

"And how do you know that, Agent Cassidy?" Gibbs snapped, his eyes almost spitting daggers.

"Because he's waiting on standby in MTAC for you, waiting for your call." Paula raised an eyebrow, all too used to Gibbs bad moods, even if this was the worst one yet.

Gibbs snarled, looking back at the screen, an unidentified emotion flashing though his eyes.

"When I get back, that better be off my damn screen, Boone!" Gibbs stormed up the stairs to MTAC, leaving them to look at each-other in confusion.

"I can just tell this week is gonna be fun."

Tim's sarcasm made them chuckle uncomfortably, and get to work.

Kyle took one more look at the Green eyes of the man on the screen, and shivered when he noticed for the first time, Anthony DiNozzo Jr's eyes; Green as emeralds and almost glazed, empty… but crazed, like he wasn't all there.

Shivering, he took the picture down.

Even so, those eyes haunted him.

It could have been me…

"It's not going to happen, Governor, I'm not interviewing this bastard again!" Gibbs snapped at Norin, almost shaking in anger.

On screen, Norin glared at him, banging his hand down on his desk.

"Gibbs, if you refuse to do this, I will go straight to SecNav and have him order you to do it. Either way, you will be interviewing Anthony DiNozzo Jr. Do you understand me?"

Gibbs gritted his teeth, his mind racing. He didn't want to interview DiNozzo Jr. The last time, Gibbs may have caught the guy, but he had been so unnerved by the young man for some reason that he let his partner Langer interview the serial killer. He could barely watch the interview, something about the killer causing Gibbs to remember his past, his little girl, and he only really caught the end of DiNozzo Jr's confession to thirty-two murders.

He had thrown the man in a cell and thrown away the key, forcing away memories of a little girl with her mother green eyes and her father smile, begging him not to go. He forced himself to turn his conflicted feelings towards DiNozzo Jr into anger and disgust.

He didn't want to interview the man again. He didn't want to remember the feelings that DiNozzo brought forth.

But it seemed he didn't have a choice.

"Oh, and Gibbs," Norin added, "He will be Interviewed in _your_ interrogation rooms. It was his condition for his cooperation."

Great.

Standing outside the interrogation room where Anthony DiNozzo Jr awaited, Gibbs found himself hesitating, his hand hovering over the handle.

The guards who had told him DiNozzo Jr was chained and waiting for him had looked unnerved, and had fled as fast as they could after they had informed him, leaving Gibbs to wonder what DiNozzo Jr had said or did to the three men for them to act that way. He knew the guard's personally, and he knew they weren't the type to be unnerved easily.

Steeling himself, he slammed open the door, hoping to intimidate the Murderer sitting at the table.

Unfortunately, the man didn't react, his eyes closed and his breathing even.

"Hello, Jethro," DiNozzo Jr spoke, not opening his eyes. "It's nice to see you again. Wasn't sure if you would come…" DiNozzo Jr sighed, his green eyes flickering open, and Gibbs once again shoved those conflicting feeling aside.

"...but then, even when you caught me, you didn't interview me then," DiNozzo pouted, making him look like a little boy, and Gibbs hid his flinch.

"I'm still a little offended about that."

"Tell me where you hid the Bodies, DiNozzo." Gibbs snapped, his voice forcefully icy.

DiNozzo Jr hummed, looking past Gibbs' shoulder, his chained hands clenching and unclenching, knuckles white.

"You've got that, silver fox thing going for you now, no brown. It's too bad, I liked your hair brown."

Gibbs gritted his teeth, wondering what DINozzo Jr was playing at.

"Bodies, Junior, now."

Gibbs almost flinched as DiNozzo Jr turned toward him, his eyes having gone slightly… wrong, a spark of something strange glinting in the haunting green.

"My father calls me Junior…" DiNozzo Jr hummed, his hands twitching, his legs jiggling, and suddenly the air in the room turned icy and thick, something both sad and dangerous permeating the air.

"...he has grey hair… he whispers it in my ear every night when I go to bed…" Gibbs felt a shiver down his spine.

Hasn't Senior been dead since his son had been in prison for five years?

"DiNozzo-" Gibbs tried to get the case on track, but Jr. Just kept talking, his voice detached.

"He told me, he said, " _DiNozzo's don't cry, Junior,_ " , " _take it like a man, Junior_ ,"..."

Gibbs swallowed at the unsaid words, and listened as DiNozzo kept speaking, something telling him what he would hear was going to be… important.

DiNozzo's eyes were glazed and his body fidgeting, and he hoped Ducky was paying attention to Jr's actions, because Gibbs had a feeling that they had clearly missed how unstable Jr had been when they first interviewed him.

" _The king and his men, stole the queen from her bed, and bound her in her bones…_ "

The haunting melody made the hairs on the back of Gibbs' neck stand up, and he didn't miss the similarity between Jr's mother's death and the song lyrics.

"Father said Mother was bad…" DiNozzo hummed louder, and his fingers twitched and scratched at the table.

" _"Mommy need to be punished Junior,_ " he said. Father had been painting, I can tell… he was covered in red paint… " _Susie needs to be punished Junior, mommy said so, can you help me_?""

Gibbs felt a forbidding feeling churn his gut, and a horrible idea began to form in his mind.

"DiNozzo, what did your father tell you to do?" Gibbs asked quietly, soothingly. The glazed and unstable expression on the younger man's face didn't change, but he turned the expression to Gibbs, and the older man saw something that he had missed before;

Regret.

Fear.

Horror.

Pleading.

"Father told me he had to punish people for their sins… " _you need to help me Junior, and the voices will go away._ " The voices would leave for awhile… but father would always want more help… he would whisper things at night… and the voices would howl… and father would punish people, " _it was their fault,_ " father said, " _they gave you the voices… punishing them will make it stop_." But they would come back…"

"DiNozzo," Gibbs leaned forward, trying to make the younger man focus. "Did your father manipulate you into hurting those women and men?"

"Father said I mustn't tell…" Jr whimpered, lips trembling, and Gibbs marvelled at the change in the man since he last saw him. Clearly, the young man's mental health had deteriorated greatly, even more than it already was.

"Father said I couldn't tell anyone he helped, he said the voices would be angry…"

"How did we miss this before, Duck?"

Gibbs asked Ducky, looking at Jr through the one way glass. He had left the room and had gone straight to the observation room, shooing his team out.

"I don't know Jethro," Ducky muttered angrily.

"This young man is clearly very mentally ill, and his monster of a father took advantage of that fact and used him to meter out his own sick desires." Ducky shook his head, looking sadly as Anthony walked around the room, muttering to himself, eyes glazed, and they could occasionally hear " _Please father_ " and " _I'm sorry_ " from the young man's lips.

"What I don't understand is how the prison missed his illness, how did Langer miss it?"

"I dunno Duck, Langer wasn't very good at reading people, and the prison I made sure to send DiNozzo to wasn't the best. I was too angry at him, wanted to hurt him. Guess I succeeded. But now I just feel like crap."

Ducky sighed, and cleaned his glasses.

"You do understand that their will be a re-trial, and Anthony will most likely be re-charged with not guilty due to insanity, and be referred to mental facilities. If Anthony had not had his father manipulate him into committing those crimes, he would have gotten help.

Anthony could have been saved, Jethro. That boy could have been good, but the actions of a monster made him into this. If he hadn't been abused, been violated, and used...he could have been a good man."

And that… was that.

Because of one small action, by a monster, a young boy's life was ruined, his future in tatters, and his mind in shreds.

In another life, Gibbs could see DiNozzo Jr becoming a good man, maybe even a cop.

But this wasn't another life.

This was reality.

"Our young Mr. Boon almost had a similar childhood." Ducky observed.

"But someone called CPS, and saved him." Gibbs pointed out.

"Yes, but what if Anthony and Kyle's roles were reversed? Things could have been very different, if Mr. Boone's father had not taken him in, and if Anthony's father was a better man," turning his eyes back to the window, Ducky grimly smiled. "It could have been Kyle in that room, and Anthony upstairs laughing with his teammates,"

"In another life, he could have been a good man."

But it wasn't.

And Gibbs felt a sharp pang of regret at that.


End file.
